That Girl

I never planned to be that girl
she of the star-crossed love and burning desire

I would see her in the hallways at school
and scoff at her silliness
girl, please
control yourself

I would see her at a soccer game
cheering her man
instead of being out there on the field
dribbling the ball
outrunning the defender
scoring the goal

I would see her in the cafe
waiting

I would see her in the library
trying to focus on her Russian
because there was an exam tomorrow
and she wanted the best grade in class
but he wanted her attention

I would see her make excuses
for his rude behavior
his boyish antics
and wonder
when does she get to be girlie?

I never planned to be that girl
she of the star-crossed love and burning desire

Then I saw you

And I don’t know if I’m that girl
but as I sit here and wait for you
hours
dolled up like you asked
wearing the dress you bought

I kind of understand her
and I kind of hate her